Rings!

I did a fun ring shoot with a Bride and Groom of mine today!

Click here to see the shots. :)



Also, I'll be doing a book giveaway soon, so stay tuned!!! :)



<3 Jenn

Shoutouts and Bloggognition.

Quickie weigh in = 200.8. I am .8 pounds away from having lost 25 pounds since December, and I'm .8 pounds away from the lovely and delicious Onederland.


Moving on...


So, I don't know about you guys, but I Google myself. All the time. I like to know where my name is popping up, and who's mentioned me in the Bloggosphere, the Web, whatever.

I want to thank a few people for some shoutouts!


Tony Momo over at Shh-Momo for quoting my opinions on Chris Thile~! As I've said before, sir, you have excellent taste. :)


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Jessi over at Shrinky-Dinky for sharing her own inspirational photos, including the ever gorgeous Goddess Kate Winslet!


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Mike over at Tootaloosa for mentioning a silly little schnibblit I found awhile back, a while back. I'm sorry I missed it, but you're still the best. :)


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Okay. Now I have a few more odd ones.


Thank you, McDonalds. You finally found me. You put me into a Social Media study (bottom of page 3) about what people's impressions are of your shit filled company.


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I'm sorry that you found me when I only had 10 Google followers, and therefore you might consider my "credibility" to be low. I look forward to many, many more posts like the one you quoted me on in the future to tell people why I think you are the scum of the earth. I hope every last one of your buildings burns to the ground during the night, that your CEO's go bankrupt.




And now for the crazy whammy.

Have you guys heard of Izea? It's a website that ranks blogs. Like, the top 100 sports blogs, and the top 100 whatever blogs.

Apparently, I was the number 4 Fitness and Health blog yesterday and today.


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You guys, seriously. What???

All I can say is THANK YOU to ALL of you, my lovely amazing readers who somehow find what I have to say to be worth a crap and want to read it every day. You guys are amazing. THANK YOU!!!!



~Jenn <3<3<3<3

More to Love.

Yeah, we all knew it was coming. I have to write about this a little bit.

I was really annoyed when I first started seeing the commercials for this reality show. If you don't know what it is, FOX is doing a show similar to "The Bachelor", but instead they're featuring "The Fatchelor" along with 20 overweight women. As far as I was concerned, they might as well have called the show "More Cushion for the Pushin'."

I didn't remember the show was starting last night, so I'll be honest and say I didn't watch the whole thing. I caught it about 2/3 the way through. From what I've read in various recaps of the show, I am not really sure this show is a good thing.

My first issue comes with the fact that they're advertising this show as: "Finally! A show with REAL women." Okay. ALL women are "real" women. Skinny, medium, fat, hairy, blonde, tall, whatever. They're all real.

The second issue I have is the fact that every time they show an interview segment with one of the women, they post their HEIGHT AND WEIGHT. What the fuck? Seriously. WHY? We already know these are "BIG girls." That's the point of the show, right? So why the hell do you need to put their heights and weights out there for the entire country to see? So the rest of us fatties can look and compare ourselves? 'Cause that's exactly what I did. Want to see the woman whose stats are closest to mine?

Christina, 23, retail, 5'6, 206 lbs


Mandy, 25, fitness trainer, 5'7, 180 lbs


Now, I'm 5'6.5 and I weigh roughly 202 pounds. So, Christina is me a few pounds ago. Mandy is what I "should" look like when I lose another 20 pounds.

Apparently, I don't only compare myself to teeny tiny skinny girls on the reality shows, I compare myself to the big girls too. And even in more excruciating detail. Body composition plays a huge part. Firstly, I don't know if these women actually had a weigh in or if they're just posting the weights and heights these ladies wrote down on some application they filled out for the show, but I have a hard time believing some of the stats.

Add to all of this the fact that the "Fatchelor" seems creepy, particularly after reading about his manipulation of the women ALREADY, and the fact that a lot of the women's interviews have been edited together to show a ton of crying and sadness... I don't know if I'm gonna be able to keep watching it. Or maybe I will. It's like a freaking train wreck, and I don't know if I have the power to turn away. Or turn it off. Or change the channel.

Nevertheless, I'd love to know what you guys think if you caught the show.

~J

To dream the impossible dream...

Okay. Have you guys seen The Man of LaMancha? My Mom and I used to watch it, and I LOVE that musical. Seriously, it's amazing.

Anyway!

This morning I weighed in at.... 201.6!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Holy crap buckets, I'm SO CLOSE to Onederland. I can't wait.


So, aside from random notes and my weigh in, I thought I'd do a little bit of blogging inspired by my friend Monica over at Confessions of a + Sized Girl. Now, I've plugged her blog before, and I'm gonna do it again. I read her entry entitled "I Don't Dream of Being Beautiful." And she also wrote one today entitled "Ramblings of a Dieting Woman," which talked about how it's easier to dream of being thin than to do the actual work.

These two posts really got me thinking yesterday and I thought and thought and now I'm gonna spew my thoughts into the fatosphere for you.

I DO dream of being beautiful, because I equate being thin with being beautiful. Now, this is primarily for myself. I do see plus sized puss-faced hotties around and think "God, she's got a gorgeous face!" or, "She's so pretty!" -- but for myself, I do not see that. I see chub cheeks, swollen jaw, tiny beady mousie pin eyes. It's odd, but I feel more upset about how weight affects my face than I even feel about my body itself.

I know when people talk about dreaming of something that they usually refer to how they wish regularly that they could achieve that thing. But I literally spend TIME day dreaming and evening dreaming about it. I'll put this into perspective for you. Do you guys know that I'm totally obsessive? I mean, not just about John Mayer, Diet Coke or Venti iced coffees at Starbucks, but overall that I am a ridiculous, clawing, grabbing, hoarding, obsessive obsessive obsessive psychotic lunatic? Okay, because I am. When I want something I can NOT stop thinking about it. When I am angry, happy, sad, jealous, hungry, afraid or any other strong enough emotion, I'm fully that for a long time.

I lie in bed at night. I lie there with my face on the side, hugging my stuffed frog and closing my eyes I imagine myself. I imagine myself walking into my friend's house at my ultimate goal weight, with slender legs, wearing cute clothes that I think will correspond to the time of year I should have lost the weight by. I do math in my head that has to do with my weight loss. Example:

"Okay. I've lost 13 pounds in the last 20 days. That does take into account water weight, and I won't continue to lose crazy weight like that forever. So, let's shoot for an agressive 3 pounds per week. That's 12 pounds per month. I go home on August 8th. I'd like to be 195 by then and probably can achieve that. So, by October 8th, say if I go home again in 2 months, I should be 171 lbs. Then if I can lose 2 pounds per week after that, that would equate to 8 pounds per month. By the time I go home for Christmas I should be at least at 155."

I seriously do this every night. I do it EVERY NIGHT. I go over and over it in my mind, how it'll be to show up looking fabulous. And I don't know exactly why I measure my timeline on when I go home. I guess I just want to show people that used to see my hotness that I wasn't going to be a fatty fat fat forever. Of COURSE not. Hello! I don't really like pizza and donuts that much, people. It was just an experiment to measure the effects of love and happiness on a woman's waistline.

::crickets chirp::

Anyway. The other part of Monica's post that I agree with is that it is DEFINITELY easier to think about and dream about being thin than to do the work. I suck balls at working out. It's way easier to control my food. And even easier than that, is to lay in bed and have fantasies about looking like Keira Knightley.

Okay, I know some people think she's too thin. But I can't help it. Every time I see this photo, I hear Britney Spears in my head... "Gimme more, Gimme more, Gimme more..." (More abs like this, please. Are they even really possible? I think this is an optical illusion. She's incredible.)



I just want to have this body:



And that photo reminds me of Giada from Food Network, who I think is amazing! How can you cook food all day and look like this??? :)



<3 Jenn

Rushin' Rollettes, part two.

So... I got to do a makeup shoot today with three girls who missed the big shoot. And that meant, I got to finish the group shot!

Click here for the photos from the shoot.

Oh, by the way! I weighed in today at 202.4. And I'm on my period right now (sorry guys if that's TMI, but you should be used to it reading all of our chick blogs by now.) -- so that means I'm probably really a little bit lower. I would love to be at 195 by the time I go to Denver on the 8th! :)

Curvy Beauty.

Hey guys!

Sorry for the lack of blogging the past couple days. I've been a busy bee!

Most recent weigh in of 203.4. Woo-hoo! I'm getting so close to breaking the 200's, I can almost taste it.

So! Come check out the photos I did for Heather and Ryan's Engagement Session! These guys were WAY too much fun. Plus, she's a curvy beauty (seriously, this girl is gorgeous) and she was wearing a FABULOUS dress. I need to ask her where she got it. :)

Bling to tha mother effin BLING!

New bling today. Guys, I almost poo'd my pants when I saw.... 204.6 on the scale today.

HELL YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So that means, I get this little beauty:




My starting stats were here in this blog entry. Yeah, how sad is it that it's taken me over 7 months to lose 20 pounds? The clear indicator that I've just been screwing around until July is the fact that 10 of those pounds I've lost since I got home from vacation.

Now, honestly, I was down to like, 203 or something when I did the Raw Detox. But then I went back to Denver and ate Cherry Chip Cake or some other crap and drank 89 gallons of beer.

So, like I have been saying. I'm serious about this now. NOTHING tastes as good as it feels to see that number on the scale go down, down down.


Although, now that I think about the fact that it's Thursday today, I realize that I forgot to go to Zumba last night. That's okay. I'll go tonight. :)


~J

The new "IT" dress...flawless on every body & budget!‏

That's the title of an e-mail I recently got from Metrostyle. I LOVE their clothes, and have ordered boots, coats, etc from them many times. They have wide calf boots, which I can NEVER find. I'm sure some of you can understand what I'm talking about. Not being able to wear sexy boots because your calves are too wide SUCKS.

So... I was excited to see this e-mail. I opened it up, and saw this:




I don't know about any of you other curvier/heavier/fatter girls, but I would NOT wear this dress right now.

Maybe "flawless on every body" only refers to people without big arms, guts and bubble butts.

~J

Questions? Answers.

So, I've had a few lovely questions in the comments section from some of you lovely folks. I thought I'd go ahead and answer them here, 'cause chances are, someone else might have had the same question too. Plus I'm an open book. I think. :)

Losing It asked about my recent 7 lb drop: "That is fantastic, how did you do it? I am starting at about the same place you are and well, need the help!!"

So, I have been on a really low calorie plan for the last 12 days. I have basically been doing this, or a slight variation:

Breakfast: Light & Fit Yogurt + Nature's Valley granola bar
Lunch: Tin of tuna mixed with 1/2 cup fat free cottage cheese, 2 tbsp of grated Romano cheese and a mixture of sliced veggies (pickles, cucumber, celery, etc)
Dinner: Huge salad with tons of veggies on it, light balsamic vinaigrette or light ginger sesame dressing.

Sometimes I'll do a huge salad for lunch instead of tuna, and if I do that, I put grilled chicken on my salad for dinner. For snacks I have sliced apple, grapes or baby carrots. I also do sugar free Popsicles for dessert. At 10 calories for 2 of them, it's a sweet treat that doesn't hurt me! :)

Now, if you actually calculate all the calories I'm eating, it's pretty damn low. HOWEVER... I'm doing this for myself for a few reasons:

1. I need to shrink my stomach back down.
2. I want to break my dependence on bread.
3. I really love the feeling of eating SALAD when I'm hungry instead of crackers, cookies, chips, junk, junk, junk.

I am taking a multi vitamin when I can stomach it. I am drinking at least 2 liters of water a day. I still drink a lot of Diet Coke because I love it. I also drink a ton of green tea.

:)


Roxanne asked me a really interesting question: "I just wonder what happened to you that 4 or 5 years ago that divides your lowest weight from your current weight. Was it a guy problem, a job/money problem, or did you gain 5 pounds and just feel so guilty that you ate uncontrollably? What happened that made you devalue yourself and lose connection with your spirit?"

Phew, what a whammy, Roxie! (Sorry. I'll stick to Roxanne if you don't like my self indulgent assumption I could shorten it and give you a nickname.;) )

So I've thought about this question. I am not really sure how to answer it.

Was it a job/money problem? No. Though I will say that having a desk job with cookies baked daily, right outside my office door didn't help the situation or my lack of control.

Was it that I gained 5 pounds and felt so guilty that I ate uncontrollably? No. I don't believe that I am an emotional eater. I am much more a boredom/subconscious/situational/doing it unknowingly eater.

Was it a guy problem? No. In fact, guy problems tend to sky rocket me toward weight loss instead of causing me to gain weight.

I'll start at the beginning. (Though I've showed photos before and done a little history here, I'll make it really clear in this post.)

I started as a fairly normal sized, what is to me now, skinny kid.


By Junior High, I got into what I call my "greasy" phase, and gained weight.


After that, I was in High School, and after hearing "move your fat ass" too many times, I signed up for tennis, gym and women's athletic weight training. Roughly 2-3 hours of working out each day got me from my greasy phase to this:


After that, I gained a bit of weight when I quit the gym classes and went to the choir side of high school life. I was probably still a size 8/10. (Me in the middle)


After that, I don't know how, but I lost a little weight when I started college.


Then, done with school, got a desk job, ate fast food every day because of time restraints, didn't know how to cook/bring healthy food for myself (I just did what everyone else did in the office). I'm here on the right.


Then, got asked out by a cute guy. Dated him for 3 months. He dumped me on the phone for another woman. I was mortified. I did Atkins, lost 40 or 50 pounds, and looked like this:


Sometimes I wish I had another heartache so I could have the transformation again.

Before: (2nd from the left)


After: (on the left)



By the by, isn't my Mother GORGEOUS???

So, needless to say, I've had a struggle with weight my entire life. It's been a continuous up and down roller coaster of home run pies and salad, short skirts and sweats covered cellulite and stretchmarks.

I had another "guy" situation at the end of 2004/2005. A man who I fell in love with didn't love me back, and my heart was broken. The entire time I was dating this guy, I felt like I wasn't enough, but I could be. I kept to my diet very strictly, thinking I needed to do better, be better to keep him around. To be GOOD ENOUGH to stay in his life. To make sure I was attractive and sexy. To ensure I could seduce him if he didn't want to stay. When things ended, I felt lower than I can explain. It still stings like you wouldn't believe. I actually have a sick feeling in my stomach about it right now. The level of self disgust I feel when I'm rejected by a man I care about is astronomical.

Quite soon after that I started a relationship with my current boyfriend, who I have been with ridiculously happily for 4 years. He's on the slim side, and can eat anything he wants to. Living with him definitely became my noose because I fell back into horrible eating habits. Add to that the fact that he loves me unconditionally, finds me sexy no matter what I have looked like, and is relentlessly supportive, sweet, caring, kind and loving... made it somewhat easier to slip back into the abyss of carb-land.



I feel guilty that he moved in with/fell in love with this woman:


And now is living with this woman:




So.

I don't know. Comfort was the culprit? I don't think I've ever thought of getting fat as "devaluing" myself and losing connection with my spirit. Maybe devaluing myself. I don't think I've ever lost connection with my spirit. In fact, the last year of my life has been the best, I've gained a ton of confidence in my talent and mind, started my own business, moved to another state, and I've still been a fat girl.

I definitely believe I'm happier when I'm skinnier because... I have more confidence in my body, I get whistles (come on, they make you feel great,) and I can wear whatever the hell I want to and not feel like a schlumpy dumpy doo doo.

I don't know if this has answered your question, but it's out there now. :)

~J

Here's a potato.

Have you seen this?

Seriously, it's the FUNNIEST thing ever.



Just had to share this with you guys, I hope it makes you laugh as much as it makes me laugh. :)

Calorie Cycling?

I'm curious to know if anyone has tried calorie cycling before. The idea is that your cycle the amount of calories you eat (or the percentage of reduction/overage) to keep your body constantly working and guessing.


Anyhoo~! A little update. I thought I'd share some photos of me doin' my photography thang.

June 28th.....................................................July 18th



And for fun, here's the photo I was taking on the right:




Not too bad. I finally fit back into my size 14 pants on the 18th!

So, here are the numbers for my weight loss:

09-Jul-2009 214
10-Jul-2009 211.4
11-Jul-2009 210.4
12-Jul-2009 209
13-Jul-2009 208.4
14-Jul-2009 208
15-Jul-2009 209.4
16-Jul-2009 208.8
17-Jul-2009 208
18-Jul-2009 207.8
19-Jul-2009 207.2
20-Jul-2009 207.2

Almost 7 pounds in 11 days isn't too shabby. But, a lot of it was also likely water weight. BUT, it still looks AWESOME. HEH! :)

~J

Gorgeous.

That's what this wedding was. Click HERE for the photos! :)

J

Almost puked.

So, I have a problem.

There are certain things I just can't eat/drink/consume in the morning. Tea is one of them. The other is multivitamins. For some reason, unless I have a meal in my stomach, I just can't do it.

The other day I had a yogurt and half a granola bar for breakfast. Then I took a multivitamin and a green tea pill. About 15 or 20 minutes later I felt super nauseous and ran to the bathroom. I dry heaved and spit a bunch of saliva, but luckily didn't puke. I was THISCLOSE though.

I think I'm gonna need to start taking my vitamins after lunch from now on.


On another note, I wanted to respond to a comment I got from Roxanne. PS, thank you everyone for all your comments. I freakin' love them and you guys make my day, so thank you again.

So, Roxanne posted this comment in response to my recent blog post 82 pounds.

Don't you think it might be a little self-destructive to focus on the past. You could diet down to 115 and wouldn't look anything like that...I'm not saying you'll look worse, but different, even better I think.

Why not just eat when you're hungry, stop when you're full - No whites: white flour, sugar, white rice, potatoes, dairy or alcohol. Nothing from a box, can or wrapper. One cheat meal per week.

First of all Roxanne, I love, LOVE her name. Just had to get that out of the way. :)

So, I don't think it's self destructive to focus on the past. This isn't THAT long ago - the skinniest me (in adult years) was in the last four and five years. Focusing on what I used to look like gives me motivation and encouragement that this is NOT impossible. It reminds me that I am the only one standing in my own way of being at a weight I'm happy at. I've been there once, I can absolutely do it again with hard work and dedication.

I also don't know that I'll "never" look like I did. Why would someone think I wouldn't? Sure, I'm four, five years older. But... that's not a huge span of time. Everyone changes a little bit from year to year, but it's not as if I'm 40 and looking, wishing, longing desperately for my 20's body and expecting unrealistically to be that girl again. I think it's perfectly and reasonably achievable.

And once again, I'd like to reiterate what I said in an older post about fat acceptance, that it's OKAY to not like where I am. I don't find any problem with whatever motivation you use as your motivation. If you find something that will help you, motivate you, drive you to be healthier, lose weight and fit into those size 10 pants if that's what you want to do, why the crap is that a bad thing?

Also, the food she mentioned is pretty much what I'm doing, except I do have yogurt so I can maintain some healthy calcium intake, as well as using canned tomatoes with Italian seasonings in lieu of salad dressing. :)

In fact, there are LOTS of great reasons to make low fat yogurt a daily part of your diet, y'all.

- One 8-ounce cup of plain low-fat yogurt provides around 400 milligrams (mg) of calcium, more than the 300 mg in an 8-ounce glass of milk.

- Yogurt also has as much potassium as a banana and as much protein as an egg or ounce of meat.

- The live bacteria in yogurt help in digestion and protect you against other harmful bacteria.


:)


So, Roxanne, thanks for your comment - I do appreciate it! And for everyone else who comments I really do love to read your thoughts, and it's great to know we're all out there in this journey together. :)

~J

Crash Diet Memories

So I've been thinking lately of all the different types of diets I've been on. Not all of them were crash diets, but I've been on quite a few.

Diets I've tried:
Cabbage soup diet (at least three times)
Raw diet
Low calorie diet
Atkins (Lost 50 pounds, gained it back plus 15)

Haven't tried:
Baby food diet
Cookie diet
Wine and cheese diet
Beer and pizza diet

Ha!

So I'm curious, what diets have you tried, what worked or didn't work? What was your favorite?

Atkins was definitely my favorite. Def, definitely. K-Mart sucks.

Who's Who

Exciting news!

I've been nominated and accepted in the Montclair Who's Who of North America for my photography business!



Woo-hoo!

Click Here to see my blog entry over on the photography side for the details.


~Jenn

60 pounds in 5 months.

So, is it possible? Yes. Is it healthy? Hmmm, depends on your definition of healthy.

I found this calorie calculator thing online that you can input your height, weight, age and activity level along with the amount of weight you want to lose in a given amount of time. The calculator spits out the amount of calories you'd consume per day per week for those results. Mine are kind of hilarious.




Wanna figure out yours?

http://www.healthyweightforum.org/eng/calculators/calories-required/

82 pounds.

82 pounds.

To be "just right", within the "normal" range for my height (a BMI of 21), I would have to lose 82 pounds. That's right. I have to lose the equivalent of a 12 year old girl. Or six bowling balls. Or the world's largest ball of tape. Or the equivalent of FOUR automobile tires.

Or I could just chop both my legs off.

I currently weigh 208 (as of this morning.) Subtract 82 pounds from 208 pounds, and you get 126 pounds. (I should clarify that I'm 5'6".)

I haven't been 126 pounds since, like, 6th grade or something.



Did you know a newborn giraffe weighs on average 130 pounds? Yeah.

To be at the very HIGH end of the BMI scale for a "healthy" weight, 150 pounds would be a Body Mass Index of 24. To get there, I have to lose 58 pounds. At least that sounds better than 82 pounds.

I can't remember the last time I weighed 150. I don't even think I weighed that when my Mom said I was almost getting "too thin."

Probably around here. A photo with my Aunt -- Look at my FACE! My face looks SO good. Right now... I have chubby cheeks. UGH. I am SO sick of chubby cheeks, y'all.



I don't really know what my weight was here, but it's what I can't wait to see again.



And holy crap, I forgot about this picture. LOOK at my ARMS! My face! Oh, my, gosh. This is my new desktop. I was a hottie. I miss myself.



~Jenn

Roller Derby Chicks.

I wanted to share with you some photos from the shoot I did today with the Brew City Bruisers' champions for the last season, the Rushin' Rollettes!

And I'll say two things. Click HERE for the photos,

and this girl.... I wish I was her:

((Hello, holy legs.))




Oh, by the way, down to 209 today. <3

Andrew's gonna kill me.

My long time, very good friend Andrew is ridiculously hot, in shape and convincing.



He's on my ass all the time about my fitness. (In a very nice, super good friend, non-asshole way.)

Maybe it's because he knew me when I looked like this (Me/Andrew below):



He convinced me yesterday that I should be working out in the mornings 30 minutes 6 days a week and I somehow agreed to this. Well, today is the first day, and I woke up just in enough time to check e-mail, write this up real quick while eating my yogurt and head out the door.

I just hate exercise, and I hate it too much to do it right when I wake up. And I wake up with barely enough time to go do the shit I need to do for the day.

Argh. Well, Andrew... I'm gonna go move a couch and a bunch of tubs of stuff, and clean for about three hours. Does that count? ;)

And Andrew, don't you know that back in the Jenn-hot-days, I didn't work out at ALL? I was just super strict with my diet. (shrinks back and waits for lecture.)

Oh, by the way. Today I saw 210.4. Down 4 pounds in two days. Bye-bye water weight.

I want to lose a freakin' pound a day until I go home in August. HA!

Dontcha, baby? Dontcha?

Dontcha just love it when you've been eating badly, then turn it around, and watch the water weight fall off?

214 to 211.4 this morning. I love that. I freaking love it. LOVE it. Now, of course I realize if I saw that every morning, it would roughly equate to my losing 90 pounds by this time next month, and that would just be assuming I live through that kind of abrupt and insane weight loss. It's not even possible. (...Is it? I don't think so. Unless you chop off body parts.)

But, there's some kind of sick satisfaction I get from seeing numbers on the scale plummet.

Oooh, plums.


So, I should probably share my eating plan with you guys. Should I? Yeah.

Breakfast: Coffee, yogurt, granola bar
Lunch: Big salad, tuna with fat free cottage cheese instead of mayo
Dinner: Huge salad (if no tuna at lunch, add grilled chicken here)
Snack 1: Baby carrots with or without ranch
Snack 2: (if hungry) 1 banana

Now, the protein will vary- whether I decide to have tuna at lunch time or chicken on my salad at dinner. Other variables will be what exactly I put on my salads, ie: olives, artichoke hearts, peppers, peas, sliced almonds, Romano cheese, etc. The goodies I put on the salads will boost my "good fats" for the day.

Have I mentioned I begrudgingly am eating turkey and chicken again? Still can't do red meat and I can't do pork for some reason, but chicken and turkey are back on the menu. Dammit!

Oh, here's a great tip. If you're gonna use cheese in something, use a strong one. My favorites are: Parmesan, Romano, Swiss, Gorgonzola. That way you can really taste the cheese and you can use less. Also those really strong cheeses are pretty low in calories. 2 tbsp of the shredded Romano I use is only like, 15 calories. Parmesan is the same way.

So, this way I'm shoving tons of veggies into my face. I literally have it PLANNED to just do the salads. I have five bags of lettuce in my fridge.

Plus unlimited Diet Coke, Water and Coffee. I have a 1 liter bottle I fill up twice a day with water, so I am making sure to get my hydration in. I have multi-vitamins I've yet to really start taking - I hate them. Also, of course crystal light and diet green tea is unlimited. Plus green tea boosts your metabolism, so they say!

I can't wait to fit into a size 8 again.

:) <3

~J

Weigh In. BOO!

214. FUCK.

(Mom, sorry, I know you read this, but sometimes you just need to say the F word.)

So, yeah. I'll be weighing in weekly from here on out until I hit 150. (laughs a belly jiggling laugh)... That feels like it's going to take a lifetime. I'd like it to happen before Christmas. All I know is I did the healthy eating, working out three times a week thing for like, 8 months, and I lost only around 15 pounds at the best. Yeah. I'll figure something out.

On a side note, does anyone know the total net calories those Biggest Loser contestants consumed? I mean, they were on a limited calorie diet to begin with, but after spending 384032984093 hours in the gym each week, wouldn't that put them somewhere in the VERY low hundreds to negatives???

And finally, on a totally non-related note, I wanted you all to check out the photos from the last wedding I did - my friend Julia has commented here a few times. Her wedding was July 3rd, and it was really awesome!

Click HERE for the photos. :)



~Jenn

Eating like a bird.

Yeah, right.

I eat like a freakin' piggie.

I just came back from my 2nd vacation in 5 weeks, and I feel HUGE. I've gained 6 lbs over the last five weeks or so. Well, I weighed myself mid day and so it might not be quite that much, but to say the least, I feel like shit.

I watched Dan's two cousins (they're 8 and 11, so they're more like nephews) eating, and their parents have to beg them to finish their plates. These two boys are really picky eaters and just aren't interested in food. I'm staring at them while they eat like, "what the hell?" -- I wish I could have that much disinterest in food. Seriously. I wish someone would be like, "Jenn, you should eat some dinner or something," and I would say, "Oh yeah, well... I guess a little something, I'm not really hungry." Or I could say, "I don't like cheese." Or, "Nah, not really feeling the stuffing today."

Seriously, I hate it and I'm PISSED OFF RIGHT NOW.

I am getting right back on the fucking horse tomorrow, 'cause I just can't do this anymore. My pants hurt, my arms are big and I spent seven days staring at Dan's sister Christina who is 30, has a daughter and looks AMAZING. I'm younger, I've never had a kid and I've never looked as good as she does. It's ridiculous.

She's on the left here:


Oh and did I mention Terry, who is on the right in that photo? She's got 2 kids, and she's in her 40's. I wanna stab myself in the face.

I will be keeping you posted, but y'all... I'm totally renewed in my quest. You should be seeing some kick ass weight loss numbers in the up and coming weeks.

~J