Day 10 and Resolutions.

Okay. Day 10: Shredded. I am officially 1/3 of the way through the 30 Day Shred! ::insert cheer track here.::

It was kind of a miracle because I seriously, seriously did not, NOT. want. to. do. it. It's about two degrees outside, everything is frozen and all I wanted to do was sink myself deep into a burrow of blankets and forget about doing anything. But, I did it. Why? 'Cause I told you people that I was doing it. And as I worked out, I thought to myself, "See Jenn? You CAN commit to do SOMETHING physical for more than a week." And I really just need to continue doing it. I think like Sue, I'm gonna bookmark Jack Sh*t's 55% blog post to keep myself motivated.


OH! The Exposed movement has seriously taken flight, and I was super excited to see this today. Pass it along. Participate. Do it, dammit. :)


Another thing I was thinking about was New Years Resolutions. Sue mentioned in her vlog today that soon the interwebs and the gyms will be hellacrowded with all those folks who wait until New Years to decide they want to get healthy and stuff. It's true. And I've never been a New Years resolution type of person. The first time I lost a bunch of weight with the Atkins diet, I decided to start in November, two weeks before Thanksgiving and plates of stuffing and bowls of mashed potatoes. I ate salad and turkey. I just figure that when you're ready to make a change, you decide THEN.

New Years isn't a magic day that makes it easier. It's a new year, yes, but you won't truly do something and be totally committed to it unless SOMETHING inside of you makes the decision, regardless of the day or the time of year or when your friend says, "let's be diet buddies!" If you make the decision because of one of those reasons, you'll end up feeling like a failure when your friend calls to see how your weight loss is going and you say you ate the entire contents of your fridge.

All I'm saying is that you don't need to wait. Take a few minutes and look inside yourself. Sit in the quiet and really think about what you want from this whole weight loss thing. What are your goals? What is it about where you are now that makes you unhappy? Dig deep and don't run away from your feelings about it. Confront them head-on and then, hold on to them. Remind yourself that you can change it, and then decide to.

A lot of you guys have asked me what my motivation is or how I've done it, etc. I totally don't have the answer to consistency. I look to other people who have achieved far better results in way less time for inspiration. All I can do is share what's worked for me. It could be different for you, and that's cool too. I just wish we could all live on the same block and run around in circles on the sidewalk together. I would totally do calisthenics with you people.

So, I'd like to share with you all my list of Non-New-Years-Resolutions.

1. Continue to shred through the 30 days.
2. After the shred, go to the damn gym for which I'm paying, and run on the damn treadmill and use the damn captains chair.
3. Work out during my near month long vacation in Denver, and NOT use it as an excuse to sit on my ass.
4. Fit into my size 8 jeans before we go to Vegas in February.


Those are my personal goals. Do you have some goals right now? I wanna see what they are. :)


And since I have no fun photos to share with you guys, and all blog entries here should really have a photo to keep it interesting, I'm sharing one of my favorite recent images, one taken by the lucky ass photographer for Details Magazine, Alexei Hay, who I am eternally jealous of, 'cause I can't figure out why the fuck I can't get John in MY studio instead of him being in Alexei's.

So I present to you, John Mayer, my eternal, never moving boy toy, makes me wanna die, partner in crime, the media whore, guitar god, YES I love the tattoos, John, the inspiration, lust and love of my life.



~Jenn

3.2 pound Cheeseburger love song.

I thought I'd remind you guys that it's the day before our first update requirement for the 100-day challenge! Get thee over to Steve's blog and let him know via comment that you're updating your blog! (remember, part of the contest is that you update your blog at least once every 10 days on your goals and progress.) Now it's not required that you drop over there to let him know you're updating, but I'd say it's not a bad idea to cover your butt so you stay in the game.

So, for those of you who are new, the Hot 100 - Going out with a Bang challenge is something some of us are doing to kick off the end of the year with a bang. You can read about it at Steve's Blog here, or on my blog here.

My goals are:
Goal #1: Lose 30 pounds by December 31st. This is just over 2 pounds per week, (roughly 14 weeks)
Goal #2: Drink at least 64 ounces of water a day.
Goal #3: NO pizza or chinese food for the rest of the year! (I tend to order this weekly, needs to stop even if it's steamed/veggied.)
Goal #4: Eat a salad for one meal EACH day.

Wow, so ... I just realized that my weight loss goal is pretty tough. But dammit, if the Biggest Loser peeps can drop those pound each week, I have no excuse to at least maintain a healthy weight loss number on a weekly basis.

My progress:
#1) Down from 190 to 186.8 (-3.2 pounds). Woo-hoo!
#2) Drinkin' the water, that's no problem.
#3) No pizza or chinese food, check. And that's really freakin' depressing, because I was watching this documentary last night on a woman who eats enough food to gain 2 pounds a day, and part of it was her chinese takeout, and it was those soft chinese noodles that look SOOOooo good, and I got all pissed off that I couldn't eat them.
#4) I honestly haven't hit this one every day. Pretty close! But sometimes when we grill a ton of veggies and corn, the last thing I have room in my tummy for, or am wanting, is a salad. I should just do salad for lunch on the days we plan to grill in the evenings.

Overall, not too bad! :)


Okay. On another note, I just need to address something really quick-like. You guys, over the last week I've just been completely flabbergasted and humbled by the insane amount of followers, comments, emails and blog posts I've seen at/about/for/to me. (Going from 112 followers to 969 followers in a week's time is off the charts incredible.) You have no idea how much it means. I literally was almost to the point of tears after reading this entry by The Insatiable Host, and this little intro on Frugal Magazine. This is not to mention the link love shown to me by the Name Nazi, Ashton Dene, and the wonderful Miss Marilee.

I just had to take a minute to thank all of you for your kindness, support and camaraderie. It's nice to know you're out there, and that I'm not alone in my craziness.

Oh! speaking of craziness, I'm gonna do two blog posts today. Keep an eye out for TMI Thursday. Comin' atcha later tonight.

I'd like to close with one of my favorite videos/songs. Dan and I sing this song together with gusto at least a few times a week and end up in laughing fits 'cause it's so hilarious. Anyone with food love of any kind will appreciate it. And you've got to watch it all the way through, 'cause the drama is just stupendus.



~Jenn

The Hot 100 - Going out with a Bang!

I've decided that if I don't participate in this, I'm a losery-loser-pants. So I'm gonna do it. I also think I'm up a pound this morning so I really need to quit this looseygoosesy attitude I have. >:(

My goals are very numbers based. Whatever I have to do to reach the numbers (working out/eating right/etc) will naturally be encompassed in the numbers goals.

Goal #1: Lose 30 pounds by December 31st. This is just over 2 pounds per week, (roughly 14 weeks)
Goal #2: Drink at least 64 ounces of water a day.
Goal #3: NO pizza or chinese food for the rest of the year! (I tend to order this weekly, needs to stop even if it's steamed/veggied.)
Goal #4: Eat a salad for one meal EACH day.

Yeah, so I think I'd better stop there so it's at least somewhat reachable. If you guys are participating let me know in the comments here so I can come check out your goals! And don't forget to let Steve know so you can be entered in the contest! :)

Also I realize I need to update you all with some progress photos. I'll see what I can do about that... maybe tomorrow? :)

~Jenn

Hey you, Obese chick!

Get outta here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today I hit 190.4 which is a milestone in one and almost two ways. The big celebration today, for my 5'7" frame, I'm no longer obese. I'm now, simply, "overweight." (((cheers)))!

* Underweight = <18.5
* Normal weight = 18.5-24.9
* Overweight = 25-29.9
* Obesity = BMI of 30 or greater



To calculate your BMI, go here. Or, I think there might even be a calculator on the right side column of my blog.

SO, my next BMI goal will clearly be 24.9 so I can become "normal." That means I need to get down to 159 pounds. From 190.4 to 159 is a loss of another 31.4 pounds (wow!) ... Yep, I've still got a lot of work to do.

But, nonetheless, I get one of these bad boys from Scale Junkie (Have I told you how I love you so, Scale Junkie??!!)




And, though I still see those pesky .4 pounds... I'm gonna jump the gun and say I get this one too for going from 225 down to 190:




Whoodiefreakinhooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


...Also, have I mentioned that I love you guys? You're the best, seriously. You keep me accountable, motivated and feeling like I'm not alone on this weight loss journey thing.

<3

Jenn

My Body is a Onederland

I'll admit it. I love that title so much I had to steal it from States of Change, who posted it on a comment on one of my earlier blogs.

Yes, my beloved readers, co calorie counters and fellow fat fighters.

Today I weighed in at 199.4.


WOO HOO!!! Peanut butter jelly time! (Except I won't eat that, but... ya know.) Peanut Butter Jelly Time!!!!!



And now, I get this bad boy:





My next goal is 186, which I would love to hit by September 5th, will take me out of the Obese BMI range and into the merely Overweight BMI range. But, until then, every 5 pound victory is something to celebrate, particularly because I get a new scalejunkie badge. Seriously, I love those things. :)

In other news, I have a wedding today, so I'll be posting new photos most likely this evening.


MUAH!!!!

To dream the impossible dream...

Okay. Have you guys seen The Man of LaMancha? My Mom and I used to watch it, and I LOVE that musical. Seriously, it's amazing.

Anyway!

This morning I weighed in at.... 201.6!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Holy crap buckets, I'm SO CLOSE to Onederland. I can't wait.


So, aside from random notes and my weigh in, I thought I'd do a little bit of blogging inspired by my friend Monica over at Confessions of a + Sized Girl. Now, I've plugged her blog before, and I'm gonna do it again. I read her entry entitled "I Don't Dream of Being Beautiful." And she also wrote one today entitled "Ramblings of a Dieting Woman," which talked about how it's easier to dream of being thin than to do the actual work.

These two posts really got me thinking yesterday and I thought and thought and now I'm gonna spew my thoughts into the fatosphere for you.

I DO dream of being beautiful, because I equate being thin with being beautiful. Now, this is primarily for myself. I do see plus sized puss-faced hotties around and think "God, she's got a gorgeous face!" or, "She's so pretty!" -- but for myself, I do not see that. I see chub cheeks, swollen jaw, tiny beady mousie pin eyes. It's odd, but I feel more upset about how weight affects my face than I even feel about my body itself.

I know when people talk about dreaming of something that they usually refer to how they wish regularly that they could achieve that thing. But I literally spend TIME day dreaming and evening dreaming about it. I'll put this into perspective for you. Do you guys know that I'm totally obsessive? I mean, not just about John Mayer, Diet Coke or Venti iced coffees at Starbucks, but overall that I am a ridiculous, clawing, grabbing, hoarding, obsessive obsessive obsessive psychotic lunatic? Okay, because I am. When I want something I can NOT stop thinking about it. When I am angry, happy, sad, jealous, hungry, afraid or any other strong enough emotion, I'm fully that for a long time.

I lie in bed at night. I lie there with my face on the side, hugging my stuffed frog and closing my eyes I imagine myself. I imagine myself walking into my friend's house at my ultimate goal weight, with slender legs, wearing cute clothes that I think will correspond to the time of year I should have lost the weight by. I do math in my head that has to do with my weight loss. Example:

"Okay. I've lost 13 pounds in the last 20 days. That does take into account water weight, and I won't continue to lose crazy weight like that forever. So, let's shoot for an agressive 3 pounds per week. That's 12 pounds per month. I go home on August 8th. I'd like to be 195 by then and probably can achieve that. So, by October 8th, say if I go home again in 2 months, I should be 171 lbs. Then if I can lose 2 pounds per week after that, that would equate to 8 pounds per month. By the time I go home for Christmas I should be at least at 155."

I seriously do this every night. I do it EVERY NIGHT. I go over and over it in my mind, how it'll be to show up looking fabulous. And I don't know exactly why I measure my timeline on when I go home. I guess I just want to show people that used to see my hotness that I wasn't going to be a fatty fat fat forever. Of COURSE not. Hello! I don't really like pizza and donuts that much, people. It was just an experiment to measure the effects of love and happiness on a woman's waistline.

::crickets chirp::

Anyway. The other part of Monica's post that I agree with is that it is DEFINITELY easier to think about and dream about being thin than to do the work. I suck balls at working out. It's way easier to control my food. And even easier than that, is to lay in bed and have fantasies about looking like Keira Knightley.

Okay, I know some people think she's too thin. But I can't help it. Every time I see this photo, I hear Britney Spears in my head... "Gimme more, Gimme more, Gimme more..." (More abs like this, please. Are they even really possible? I think this is an optical illusion. She's incredible.)



I just want to have this body:



And that photo reminds me of Giada from Food Network, who I think is amazing! How can you cook food all day and look like this??? :)



<3 Jenn

What are your Goals?

And I don't mean weight loss goals.

My good buddy Monica over at Confessions of a + Sized Girl posted a blog HERE about goals. I love this and I'm doing it.

So what are your goals? And again, make the list as if you are at your weight loss goal already! At least one thing that you hope to accomplish by the December 31st this year.

1. Run a 5K.
2. Wear a dress cut above my knees without feeling ashamed and gross.
3. Crack a gross income of 50K for my first year of being a Pro Photographer.
4. Learn how to do basic Pin Up hair and makeup styling.
5. Be able to regularly maintain a clean home, clean dishes, clean laundry.

Alrighty! I'll honestly say I'm most excited and nervous about the first goal there. And now I wanna hear yours! :)

~J