Thursday, November 26, 2009

TMI Thursday: Who pees on Jesus?

Okay. First I'm going to tell you all that I weighed in this morning at a glorious 174.8 pounds! That means I've officially lost 50 pounds!!! YAY! I got this gorgeous new button from Scale Junkie:

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Now, all about our Thanksgiving!

First: I called my Dad and told him how I was all sad that I didn't wake up to my Mother coming into my room with Tom the Turkey and asking me to give it a good luck spank. My parents did pizza and football for Thanksgiving this year, so my Dad said, "Well, the only thing we're spanking here is the pepperoni." I laughed, but asked him to never say that ever again.

Then: I decided on what to wear. A dress I bought but couldn't fit into until now!



And Then: We took some pretty pictures after we ate some yummy food. I stuck to the plate rule and I had one bite's worth of each kind of pie (pumpkin, cherry and pecan.) I didn't feel deprived, I wasn't uncomfortably full and it was enjoyable! :)

Dan and I:


Me with Dan's beautimus sister:


We Also: Did a gift card and ornament exchange and I scored Starbucks. WOO HOO! Oh, and we showed the family our latest holiday photos, and they were a big hit. :)



Now it's time for the TMI of the day.

TMI Thursday

After all the food was put away and we were all hanging around, I had to pee. I went down the fancy hallway, into the fancy bathroom and I did my tinkle business. Right across from the toilet, these folks had a big gold cross on the wall with a sign that said, "Everything happens for a reason. Just believe." They are pretty religious folks. So I was staring at this cross for a few minutes and then I reached over to grab some toilet paper. This is what I saw:



I looked at the toilet paper and then I looked at the big gold cross. I looked closer. It was a frickin' J-C.



I'm sitting there on the verge of drip drying, trying to figure out why the hell anyone would put Jesus Christ's initials on their toilet paper. Yes, I understand folks being really, really religious, but wouldn't that totally be... like, seriously, seriously blasphemous? I started to freak out and think I would go to hell if I used this toilet paper.

I sucked it up and turned it inside out when I wiped. I said a little apology prayer as I flushed, and then I went out into the living room. I asked Dan to go into the bathroom and tell me what the heck was on the toilet paper.

He took one look and said, "H."

Yeah. Apparently I'm a moron. It's an "H" for their last name.




Hope you all had the best Thanksgivings yet! Tomorrow? Get ready to rock the 30-Day Shred!!!

~J

35 comments:

Monica said...

LMFAO

I will think of you every time I see toilet paper now...

chickadee said...

TOO funny!!!

Congrats on your hard work to lose the 50 lbs. I can only imagine how wonderful that must feel!

kanmuri said...

The crucifix must have influenced you. The only thing I could see was H. :D

Vodka Logic said...

Well done on losing 50lbs.

And I saw an H so Iwasn't sure where you were going...funny.

Dee said...

Oh that is too funny!
you look HOT. congrats on the 50 pounds - i am guessing that is about 22kg? WOW!

Runnergirl said...

You look incredible! And SOOOOO Skinny now... Well done you!
Happy Thanksgiving (belated!)

Mommy2Joe said...

That's an H? Really? I totally would have been with you on that one.

Congrats on the 50. Good luck on the shred. I was up and out at 5 to run this morning because I have a matter of a Little Black Dress in a couple of weeks. Woot.

Jennifer said...

Congratulations on your hard work, lookin' good!

Lauren Ashley said...

Congrats on the 50! Totally amazing!!!

Where did you get that dress? I love it!

karen@fitnessjourney said...

You look amazing! The dress is perfect for you. I think you need to change the title of your blog to "Current Hot Girl"!

~ugly girl with a beautiful heart~ said...

You look great!

And that shit on the TP totally looks like J-C!!!

Midwest Girl said...

Dude, it's totally a JC!

Creepy...

But then again, who would go and put their initials on toilet paper? Towels, sure, a framed piece of art work, OK. But something people wipe their ass with, not so much.

Deb said...

Ha! Looks like a J-C to me too!

Kendra said...

Haha, I saw H at first..but then when reading your perseption...yeah, saw JC...

That would probably freak me out too!

Chuck said...

If you look that hot now...WOW another 30 lbs dropped would put you in the smokin' category! Congrats on -50! Lucky Dan!

Now about your question, no I would not pee on Jesus (not knowingly) and I can see the JC or the H but that's the way I'm wired.

The real question I have is...do you carry a small point and shoot camera EVERYWHERE??? To think there might be a photo op in someone's bathroom so "I'll just take my camera to pee" just cracks me up!

Erin said...

Congratulations on reaching that milestone...what a tremendous accomplishment. No one else commented on it, but I would have died laughing if my dad had mentioned spanking the pepperoni, too!

Zan said...

You had me at "spanking the pepperoni"...

And congratulATIONS on losing 50 pounds! I'm so proud of you! You look FAHbulous!

And I saw "J-C", too...

Quincifer said...

I think me and everyone else read it as J-C too!
Words cannot describe how much I laughed at your dad says "spanking the pepperoni" - Cringe!

God dammit, you looked gorgeous! I'm so jealous. Congrats on the 50lbs, you look amazing for it, I love that dress!

A Synchronistic Catalyst said...

It did NOT look like an H to me (and my surname begins with H).

I also saw J - C.

LOL!

Christy in Seattle said...

HAHAHA!!!

Awesome!

LiLu said...

Okay, A)? HILARIOUS.

B)? Who gets personalized toilet paper? Like, isn't that still sort of... awkward... to be wiping your ass with your own name? Why not, like, something you hate? Like the Yankee's TP I've always wanted, so I can wipe my ass with A-Rod's face.

Happy T-Day!

Fireblossom said...

I saw it as "H", but can totally see the "J-C" too. I don't think I would want the supreme being, OR my host's initial on my Charmin, tyvm.

You look beautiful, btw. Congratulations on losing fifty pounds, that's quite an achievement!

Losing Waist! said...

The uh... "dogs tuxedo"???? I fucking cracked up over that, and then tried to use it... FAIL. I am going to keep working on using it because it is cool.

I need better expressions besides FUCK.

P.S. You have been exposing the bod in clothes, and other various stages of attire... Not really an "ex" hot girl anymore...??

The Expatresse said...

I can't believe you weigh 178. You look like less than that to me.

I, too, saw a J-C on the paper. Too funny. Plus, who gets monogrammed TP? WWJD?????

Sunshinemeg said...

Hilarious! Hahaha, that is crazy. Congrats on the 50 lbs. I'm a new follower and pumped for you!

Kandia said...

LOL!!!! I would have thought it was a JC too....maybe if the little dash was connected it would have looked more like an H. Still LOL @ the drip-dry comment.

Mimi and Tilly said...

Hysterical! I am sitting at my computer laughing out loud. That is so not an H. I am with you on the JC. And if it is an H, why in the name of all that is good and great would you want people wiping themselves with your initial? Wrong, just wrong.

Loser Girl Jess said...

Congrats on the 50lbs! You look great in the dress, and I bet you feel awesome as well:)

Poor, poor Jesus:)

Anna said...

Omg! That's too funny!

Tricia said...

lol too funny!

Ashleigh said...

First of all, Congrats!!!! You look great and you must be so proud of yourself! Second of all, That is so funny that you thought that was Jesus Christ toilet paper! I, too, would not feel right peeing on Jesus! So good for you! ;-)

Claire said...

I TOTALLY saw JC, even after you said it was H. That's just wrong! :)

You looked fantastic in that dress! Congrats, and Happy Thanksgiving!

The BreakUp Coach said...

I thought this post was going to be along the lines of a recent episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm in which the lead character actually splashes pee on a painting of Jesus and the hosts think it's a miracle because Jesus is shedding a "tear". Anyway, it's possible that the TP was a gift? In any case it is a little strange, but as usual great material.

Miss Marilee said...

Jeez Louise woman!! That dress rocks and you look rad in it!! =) p.s. I missed blogging too much...

NYC Girl said...

LMAO! This is too funny! Hey it looked like JC to me too!