Halloween: Costumes!

I can't believe it's already time to shop for Halloween costumes again.

I just get so frustrated trying to find a costume.  It seems that everything that's fun is also SUPER short.  Have any of you guys noticed this?

Here are some of the ones I really like, but won't wear because they're so short.



SO adorable.  Totally slutty.

Also, what exactly is the difference between these two costumes?



The thought had occurred to me that I could rock a red-head character because I already have the red hair.  I thought maybe one of these might work:



Also, what...exactly... is "plus size" about this girl?



Is it that she doesn't look like this?



Because honestly, the "Plus" size model is way... WAY hotter.

Ultimately, I think I might have decided to go "Gypsy."  Of course the costume I want is around $120.



Thoughts?

~J

NaNoWriMo a Go. And Halloween.

Alright, you guys. I've had it. I'm doing it. If you're doing it, we're doing it together.



NaNoWriMo.org... I'm "jennybeanjcb" if you guys want a writing buddy. I don't know what that means, I just know some of you have offered yourselves up as writing buddies. So, we should all be buddies. Though I should probably write the story with a pen name. I can't tell you details yet. I'd have to kill you.



Oh, and follow me on twitter too, (ExHotGirl).



Now that that's out of the way... some photos from Halloween! :)



One of my best friends, Jesse, decided to dress up as Julia Child! He won the costume contest, and left the bar with $300 in his pocket! Here's Jesse pre-makeup!





Here he is in costume:







I was so proud, I could have spit on a stranger:





Dan and I at the hotel getting ready:





Us at the bar trying to look all in character and stuff:







Me with Wes (Swish Embassy):





A few pics from the night:








Us with Junior from Reno 911!





My friend Jon and his girl Mal... or should I say, dead Waldo and the zombie that ate his face:






How was YOUR Halloween?!?? :)



~J

Paranormal Handshake Shenanigans

Hello lovelies!

I'm sorry I haven't been able to update y'all since TMI Thursday. Vacation'll do that to ya.

I wanted to share some photos with you guys from the trip so far! I'll start with this one... since some of you noticed on Thursday that yes, my boyfriend's name is Dan, and my brother's name is Daniel. Here's a photo of them together (boyfriend on the left, brother on the right):



Denver got about 2 feet of snow in the Metro area, and the mountains got almost 4 feet! Here are some promised snow photos:






Dan caught this huge ladybug attacking my head while I was reading:


I love my brother, even though he tries to ruin every photo by being inappropriate:




I was lame and didn't play cards at my friend Wes' housewarming party last night, but I took some pictures of everyone else!



Diet-wise, I'm doing okay. We went out for Mongolian, and it was awesome! Of course fish, shrimp, veggies, tofu... all good for you. What's in the peanut sauce and thai sauce, I don't even want to know. Sugar, sugar, sugar.



Oh. OH. I have to share this video with you guys. This was Thursday night, and we were playing Spades at my brother's condo. (Favorite card game, ever!) -- The guy on the left is my brother's best friend Nich. My brother is on the right, and the guy in the middle is Dan (my boyfriend.) My brother and his friend Nich did a handshake without practicing and they freaked out, apparently thinking they read each other's minds. They then told me they wanted to do it over and over, 'cause it was the coolest thing ever. I don't know about that, but I know my brother's hyper laugh makes me laugh every time!



So, the other thing I meant to blog about was Paranormal Activity! If you don't want spoilers, then you should just skip this part, 'cause I'm gonna talk about it.

I thought the movie was pretty sweet. I personally have a fixation/obsession/love for all things paranormal. I love watching the shows or hearing stories from folks who have had, or think they've had encounters with some kind of ghost or spirit or something. So this movie was a naturally good choice for me. Dan tricked me and told me that this movie was supposedly made up of real footage. That definitely gave me a better "in" to the movie because, though I was a bit skeptical, I kinda-sorta thought it was real. I guess that's why people compare it to the Blair Witch project. (I haven't seen that one, but I suppose I need to now.)

I loved the voyeuristic aspect of the movie. Some people thought it was kind of slow, but I didn't. I liked it, and every single time they went to the night footage, I was on the edge of my seat, looking all around the room trying to see shadows move or something. I wanted to see things happen.

When things started to get really weird, I was definitely shocked. (ie: the sheet being puffed up over her body, when she'd stand up and stare at the bed for a few hours straight, etc) -- During those parts I was mouthing over and over to myself, "What the fuck! What the fuck!" It was just WEIRD and crazy.

I totally enjoyed the whole movie, except for the ending. (Isn't the ending ALWAYS what we have problems with?) I thought it was totally cheesy, particularly when she looked up into the camera at the end. And her whereabouts are unknown? Lame. I saw the alternate ending on YouTube, and it was a little better, and I felt it fit with the rest of the movie more, but it was also lame. I think they should have extended the last scene out longer with more of an off-camera struggle. I think they could have had something better. They both should have died. Dan said the house should have burned down, but the problem with that idea is that the footage wouldn't have survived.

So! I'm curious to know all y'all's thoughts on it. It's actually one I'd watch again... but I think the thrill would be gone, knowing what all happens. What did YOU guys think of it? Any other scary movies you'd recommend?


~Jenn

Lauren makes me wanna Ralph.

Quick update before the real issue at hand:

100-day blowout thinggie update...

• I weighed in at 187.8 this morning, but it's that TOM, so I'm rolling with it.
• Not doing so well on the water front. Coffee and tea, and some Crystal Light, and a little vodka. I need to drink more water.
  

In other update news:

• I went to the gym and did a Zumba class for the first time in 2 months. It's a shame, but I finally got my ass over there and it was fun. I'm sore.
• I bought a jump rope online. I can't wait to start using it. It's my goal to jump rope at least three times a week.

Also, I got my Halloween costume. It's awesome:

I thought I'd have to order a plus size, as I blogged about earlier. When I did some research it appeared I was exactly between the large in "regular" costumes, and the smallest size in the Plus Size costumes. Piiiiissed! It's such a shitteous place to be, weight wise:



(Oh, by the way, I'm doing this costume, with the makeup style I showed there below the costumes, but with this wig:)



So, I took a chance since I should be a little smaller by Halloween and ordered the large in "normal" costumes, which says it fits up to a 14. I tried it on, and it fits! The dress is much longer than it appears in these photos (or I have a child's length torso), and the only thing I might have a slight bit of trouble with is the striped part on the "sleeve." I still have wobbly old bag arms and it could spell disaster. It's like having mini muffintops on my arms. Just eew. So, I pulled them up all the way to my armpit and it's doable. I'm gonna have to do a crapton of pushups and lift some weights and do chair dips for the next three weeks. Yes, I know, I know, you can't "spot tone" but dammit, I'm gonna try anyway.


And now for what this is really all about. I just can't help myself. I HAVE to post about this.

I don't know if you guys subscribe to Photoshop Disasters (who I heard about through Swish Embassy - if you support the LGBT community you should check out and follow them,) or read any of the great blogs like Jezebel, but if you do, you've likely already seen this. If not, I'm sharing it with you.

Now you guys know how I feel about altering women's bodies (or men's, or whomever) with photoshop. I'm a photographer, and I know how things work in the world of advertising and magazines, and how it's all bullshit. People ask me sometimes to alter their bodies, and for the most part, I won't do it. I'll flatten an occasional pudge if there is a bit more than usual sticking out because of a pose I have the person in, but I will not make your waist smaller, I won't make your eyes bigger, and I won't shrink your muffin top. I think it's wrong, and I think there is beauty and value in everyone, just as they are.

Ralph Lauren, on the other hand, are a bunch of delusional assholes.



I'm not even going to touch the moron who edited this photo, but I want to know who the hell approved it. How could any reasonable human being who sees other human beings on a regular basis, and even sees super thin super models on a regular basis, could ever, EVER think this even remotely looks right? The ironic thing to me is... if they took measurements on this model, then cut them down to the size they made her appear, Ralph Lauren doesn't even come close to making clothes that small. Their smallest clothes in women's sizes are for a size X-Small, which equates to a U.S. size 2, and fits a size 25" waist.

Let me say it one more time, just so it's really, really clear:

Magazine editors, advertisers and all those other ass-hats are careless, selfish, greedy prick, buttfool douche nozzles. Do NOT look at these images and think you should come anywhere close to what they look like. Take this as harsh proof that it's all a lie, and you're gorgeous, curvy, real, naturally slim, bootylicious, chunkeriffic, thin, average, curly, straight, kinky, delicious and every other thing.

Love yourself.

~Jenn

Halloween for Fatties.

I've begun the process of trying to find a suitable Halloween costume. As MANY of you ladies out there know, this usually sucks major balls when you're a fat chick. In years past, all I can remember being available to me was this:




Dan and I were looking at these and just laughing our asses off. Is this really the only option to plus size chicks? Wearing what's basically a modified version of a Snuggie? I've been there before, and honestly, that's why I've not dressed up or done anything for Halloween the last two years in a row.

But recently I've noticed a much higher availability of plus size costumes. And this year I've seen lots of really cool costumes for plus size girls. These ones aren't just MooMoo-Shmocks disguised as "costumes"... they're actually SEXY costumes. I went to Buycostumes.com today and found these:



Woo to the freakin' HOO! Now, I'm not sure if I have the balls to pull off a short skirt like these, but I'm really happy to know it's an option. If I'm not brave enough, there are middle of the road ones available too.

I'm just glad to know I won't be stuck wearing this:



If I really feel like wearing this:




SO! In addition to this, I wanted to give a little nod to my friend Hanlie over at Fertile Healthy for posting an entry about Steve's "Hot 100 (Going out with a Bang!)" Challenge.

Here’s the information you need to know:

1. You have to come up with some goals.
2. You have to publish those goals.
3. You have to give a status follow-up on those goals at least every ten days.

Oh! And if you participate, be sure to leave him a comment HERE so he knows to include you in the drawing.


So... I don't have mine fingered out yet, and I'm not sure if I'm going to do it, but I wanted to pass the info along to any of you fabulous folks who are being motivated by The Biggest Loser, or just feeling like you're in a little bit of a slump and would like some extra OOMPH! to push you toward your goals. The prize does sound wonderful, especially if you like some extra spice in your life. :)

I'll keep you all posted on my participation decision in a few days. I just need to come up with some realistic goals, and I think I just might do it. :)

~Jenn