Grapes and Boobs.

Hey all!

I thought I'd share some photos to let y'all know what I've been up to in Grand Junction! I'm visiting my awesome Aunt and Uncle, and my Cousin and his wife! :)~

The whole crew:


Me, my Aunt and Kiesha:


Me with my Aunt and Uncle:


Sugar free popsicles are my favorite!


But they do funny things to my BRAIN!.....


Auntie, Me, Travis and Rach:


We're a couple-a goofballs:




I'm a wild and crazy gal...




So yeah, I don't have anything really important to say but share some photos with y'all.

I'll be back to check in soon! :)~

28 Bug Bites.

At least.

I'm covered in bug bites. I have no idea where I was around a ton of mosquitos or red ants or biting microscopic midgets, but I'm covered in miserable, itchy bites. It's worse than when I went camping, you guys. I don't know how this happened.

I'm going to have to go get a giant bottle of clear nail polish. (the "venom" in mosquito bites itches because it interacts with oxygen, so if you seal off the bite with clear nail polish, it won't itch anymore.)

On a side note, I'm down to 196.4 today. That means I've lost roughly 3 pounds over the last 10 days. That feels like a small loss to me, though 10 days is one week plus 3 days. So.. I don't know. I guess I'm just getting used to the faster weight loss and if it slows down I start to freak out. :/~

Oh! And being down to 196.4 means that I only have 5.4 pounds left to lose until I'm no longer OBESE, but am only "OVERWEIGHT." (I'm 5'7")

I'm heading to Grand Junction in a few hours to see my Aunt and Uncle until Friday. They do have internet access, but I'm not sure how much I'll be blogging. It's a very "back to nature" type of retreat for me, so you might not hear from me for a few days unless something happens and I NEED to tell you all. My Uncle is a crazy good cook though, so that might happen. He's told me he will be working up a great low fat fish dish for me, so I hope he does that and does NOT make his famous crepes or anything else like that.

Ciao!

~Jenn

Top Ten Things That Don't Cause Arthritis.

Sometimes I like to go to msn.com and click on the "health and fitness" section just to see what's new out there in the health and fitness world. Lots of times I'll find articles about how to perfect your sunless tan or how to do better dead lifts, but today I found an article that caught my eye.

This article had a ton of promise, but wound up sorely disappointing.

It was entitled "Top Ten Things That Don't Cause Arthritis."

Now, I expected this to be an awesome article, full of funny things, but it wasn't. It just WASN'T. No, it sure as hell wasn't. Instead, it had real and medically based things like:

Cracking knuckles: Although you can injure a joint by overenthusiastic knuckle cracking, there is rather convincing evidence that regular knuckle cracking has little effect on joint health.

Okay, well I kind of DID think that cracking your knuckles could lead to arthritis, and I'm glad to know this little tidbit. Maybe this wasn't the best example. But I'm telling you, I expected the list to look like this instead:

Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches: Although there has
been some speculation that obsessive eaters of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches might actually be setting themselves up for arthritis due to constant and repeated lid opening, knife dipping, and condiment smearing, there is actually no proof that eating copious amounts of PB&J's will actually cause arthritis.

I am pretty sure we could come up with a much more bomb list. We're writers. We're funny. Help me out here, folks. I'm gonna post a much, much better list of things that don't cause arthritis once I've got nine more.

Ready, set, comment.

~J

Super YAY!

So, as many of you know by now, I'm a photographer!

I was on the A-List in Denver, and now have been put on the A-List in Milwaukee since I moved here. It's that time of year again to vote for the best photographer in the city!

I'd love it if you enjoy my photography, if you would take a brief moment to vote for me! :)~

Vote Here:

http://wisn.cityvoter.com/jbe-photography/biz/85463


Thanks so much you guys, and you ROCK my world!!!

Kelly Clarkson is human.

Wait. What?

Yeah, Kelly Clarkson is a human, normal woman in a maddened, image-driven, body obsessed industry. It's a huge shock. So why is this ground breaking news???

Kelly Clarkson looks curiously thin on the cover of "Self Magazine"!



"We're shocked! It's a "positive body image" issue! She shouldn't be airbrushed on the cover!"

Self magazine admits it did airbrush the singer, but no more than they do every other cover model. The editor-in-chief argued, "Our picture shows her confidence and beauty."

Um, this happens every freaking day. Women's magazines are constantly telling us to be "empowered" and at the same time, "lose 10 pounds in two weeks!" and check out the "top ten ways to drive your man wild in bed!" and airbrushing the crap out of all the models so we all feel like crap about ourselves and want to buy all the products and magazines and other shit we're supposed to consume (except for food, unless it's diet food of course) to make ourselves into this impossible ideal of what we are SUPPOSED to look like, even though the CELEBRITIES don't even look like that.

Okay, three cheers for the longest run-on sentence EVER. I just had to get that out.

Oh, and also... the photo shows her "confidence and beauty"?? So, women are only confident and beautiful if they're thin as you photoshop them to be? Ass-hats!!!! She's confident and beautiful all the time, and you people are pieces of shit.

It reminds me of what they did to Kate Winslet. Remember this beauty of a photoshop botch job?



She was FURIOUS. Kate's always been one of those fabulous celebrities who has been proud of her curvier body and the fact that GQ shrunk her down to a size 2 was unacceptable. Why do photo editors think they have the right to change someone's entire body?? It's garbage, crap and totally ridiculous.

It pisses me off.

Carry on.

~J :)

Birthdays are bad for your butt.

My birthday is August 15th, and I've already been wished a happy birthday by several restaurants. Oi Vey!

Red Robin
Dairy Queen
On the Border
Noodles and Company

They all have sent me coupons for free food!




The lowest calorie items I can find for these places are:

Natural Burger @ Red Robin: 570 calories, 979g sodium (just for the burger, no fries!)
Small Hawaiian Blizzard @ Dairy Queen: 440 calories
Small Bangkok Curry @ Noodles and Company: 250 calories (less than I thought!)
Chicken Enchilada w/ beans and rice @ On the Border: 610 calories


My parents asked me where I'd like to go for my birthday celebration. I told them I would love to go to Sweet Tomatoes. If you don't have one in your state (There isn't one in Milwaukee, which sucks)- you should definitely go to one if you ever get the opportunity to. It's the most awesome salad bar place, ever. I remember a place called "Healthy Habits" that used to be in Colorado. It was SO good, and then it got shut down for some reason. I have lots of fun family memories there, so it's kind of a bummer. But, Sweet Tomatoes is a close second and a great alternative.

So, I'm sorry to all you high fat, super yummy restaurants and dessert places. I'm gonna keep my belly in check by NOT taking part in free blizzards, brownie desserts, noodle dishes and burgers.

Not-so-regrettably,

Jenn

P.S. If you haven't already, go check out the photos from the wedding I shot last night! It was a fun one.

P.S.S. I am running on 2.5 hours of laying in bed, not quite sleeping. Gotta love 6am flights. Yucky! Welp, gettin' on the plane in a few minutes. I'll update soon!

A Rainy Wedding

I never thought I'd see the day when I'd go into Target to buy 16 umbrellas and a pair of galloshes. It was worth it. :)

Come check it out, yo!